Dear Graduates,
You’ve thrown your cap in the air; as it comes down, so might your euphoria, despite knowing you accomplished something large. You’ve finished – maybe high school, maybe college – and you’re ready to take on the world. It’s possible you’re terrified, feeling unprepared for what comes next.
Even if your instructors were diligent about teaching you quadratic equations and the causes of the War of 1812, they may have neglected to teach you why that matters or how you will use it in the real world. Perhaps you can write an amazing five-paragraph essay defending your viewpoint, but not a cover letter that will help you receive a job interview.
Your guidance counselors gave you advice about how to apply for college or choose a major, but maybe less about the long-term effects of taking out massive college loans.
By now, the caregivers in your life probably taught you some basic survival skills. You know that washing a red shirt with white socks will turn them pink. If you’re a roommate, you’ve learned that respect means making your bed, emptying your garbage can, and picking up your dirty dishes. Hopefully you know how to prepare food well enough to stave off starvation. It’s likely you’ve had a job, earned a paycheck and performed the miracle of the loaves and fishes as your bank balance lessens but your expenses do not. You have learned that nothing bad will happen if you cut your own bangs, that houseplants and pets die, and that cockroaches do not.
A new world awaits. Because you don’t know what you don’t know, here’s some advice gleaned from interviewing your slightly older peers, things they wish they’d known when they exited school. The advice of these 20-30 year olds ranges from the mundane to the philosophical.
First, recognize that everything will change. While graduating is an important accomplishment, you’ll be surprised by how tiny this looks in hindsight. Problems, successes, and even friendships that loom large in school are mere blips when viewed through the longer lens of history. Your BFF might turn out to be a faded memory, but so will the awkward way you behaved on that date. Almost none of it matters long term.
Unsure about what to do with your life? Don’t worry. The adults who love you dissuade you from getting married at your age, or even getting a tattoo. You’re too young to make such life-long decisions, we insist. And yet we expect you to be ready at age 18 or 22 to pick the career path you will follow for the next few decades.
Nonsense, your peers say. Isabel, 21, points out that “College isn’t actually the start of your life. There is no start. Just live. You have so much time.”
Veronica, 22, concurs. “It’s okay not to know what you want or have your life planned out. Most people don’t. Just constantly try to learn and discover new parts of yourself as you grow. Not knowing what’s ahead can actually be freeing as it allows for possibility.”
Paulina adds, “After high school, everything’s optional. College is a choice, whatever job you get is a choice, the people with whom you surround yourself is a choice. Make choices that make you happy and put you on a path that will lead you to peace.” Torrey, age 22, agrees. She wishes she’d delayed or even skipped college altogether.
Ignore what others are doing around you. During this time, you may find your path uncomfortably mismatched with that of your peers. Don’t compare yourself to them. Some of your friends will have flashy internships, while others wait tables full time. Either way, it isn’t your business.
In the meantime, learn about money. It’s imperative that you know how to apply for a job, file taxes, or rent an apartment. Make a budget and stick to it, adjusting your tastes as necessary. Establish good credit and keep that credit golden.
Avoid saddling yourself with enormous college loans. Vivian, age 28, was the first in her family to go to college. She borrowed money, a sum which will take her approximately a decade after graduation to pay off. “There’s very little education required for someone to borrow money, someone who literally knows nothing about what they’re signing up for.”
Self-care is another area your older peers emphasized. Don’t forget to eat, preferably more fruit than fast food. Drink more water than alcohol. Sleep is underrated, as is therapy. Consider getting more of both.
Seek out hugs. Adulthood has less of them; be intentional about finding the good ones.
Be successful, sure, but be kind first. It raises the quality of your life.
Good luck, graduates. Go out and make us proud. But more importantly, make yourselves proud.
